The fan balloting for the All-Star Game closes tonight. In less than an hour actually. I voted twice more (since I could), once somewhat seriously and once for fun. It seems as if most of the early craziness has corrected itself. Derrek Lee is not going to get slighted. Ichiro and Tino Martinez aren't starters as of right now. Cesar Izturis, who's fallen off the map since his great May, has been overtaken by the slow but steady David Eckstein.

"Serious" ballot: AL Justin Morneau, Brian Roberts, Miguel Tejada, Alex Rodriguez, Joe Mauer, David Ortiz, Johny Damon, Manny Ramirez, Mark Kotsay NL Lee, Jeff Kent, Eckstein, Scott Rolen, Paul Lo Duca, Andruw Jones, Cliff Floyd, Miguel Cabrera

"Fun" ballot: AL Paul Konerko, Tadahito Iguchi, Brandon Inge, Bobby Crosby, A.J. Pierzynski, Bobby Kielty, Kevin Mench, Scott Podsednik, Travis Hafner NL Hee Seop Choi, Mark Grudzielanek, Garrett Atkins, Clint Barmes, Jason Phillips, Jason Bay, Carlos Lee, Willy Taveras

Rob Neyer does this thing all the time where he compares two players without giving their names, and then surprises you by revealing who they are. I'm going to do that now.

Pitcher A: 17 starts, 2 complete games, 110 innings pitched, 81 strikeouts, 33 walks, 12 home runs, 6.63 K/9, 1.22 WHIP, .240 BAA, 3.85 ERA.

Pitcher B: 16 starts, 1 complete game, 101 innings pitched, 63 strikeouts, 31 walks, 11 home runs, 5.61 K/9, 1.42 WHIP, .285 BAA, 4.54 ERA.

Pitcher A is Danny Haren. Pitcher B is Mark Mulder. Pretty neat, huh? I mention this because I listened to Haren win his sixth straight decision earlier today and Mulder will pitch against the Rockies on Sunday. You never know how trades involving fistfuls of prospects will turn out, and it sure seems as if Oakland (who also got useful reliever Kiko Calero and much-loved prospect Daric Barton) won this one. Almost makes up for the reaming they took in the Tim Hudson trade.

I don't think there's much that needs to be said about this Cardinals team that their best-in-the-NL 49-28 record doesn't already communicate articulately. For fun, then, in lieu of our usual style of series preview let's take a look at the chances St. Louis and the other division leaders have of staying put.

AL East: Current leader is Boston at 45-32. Baltimore is 2 games back. I think the Red Sox have the best talent in this division, and I don't think many would disagree with me. Baltimore's first half was a good (if overplayed) story. I doubt even a trade for Jason Schmidt would compensate for the healthy return of Curt Schilling which Boston anticipates. I put Boston's chances at 80%.

AL Central: The Chicago White Sox have the best record in baseball at 53-24. The Twins are 10 1/2 back despite very possibly being the third-best team in the league. It's pretty hard to blow a ten-game lead. That said, the White Sox have made a semi-tradition out of second-half slides the last few seasons, and Minnesota often seems to have their number head-to-head when it counts. It's not impossible, just very improbable. Let's call it 95% that Chicago takes it.

AL West: The Angels put a great deal of distance between themselves and Texas this past week. Anaheim is 47-31, and the Rangers are 6 1/2 back after winning today. A bigger threat may be the surging A's, who have won 7 in a row to get within 10 games of the division lead and 2 games from .500. I have doubts about the Angels' starters and their offense, but you have to figure they can afford to get the help they need. 65%, because the Angels have two legitimate challengers.

AL Wild Card: I like Minnesota. 75%.

NL East: Washington's dream season continues, 47-31. Still, even last place New York is only eight back, and Atlanta hangs around at half that. I highly doubt the Nationals will be able to continue playing invincibly at home with a .600 record despite scoring fewer runs than they allow. I give them a 15% shot, Florida 40%, Atlanta 25%, Philadelphia 15%, and the Mets 5%.

NL Central: As I mentioned, St. Louis stands at 49-28. The on-again, off-again Cubs are nine back. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that there is no chance that Chicago will catch the better-constructed, better-managed, and way-less-cursed Cardinals. 100% chance of St. Louis repeating as division champs.

NL West: The most miserable division in baseball is led by San Diego at 43-36. The Padres may well be just as secure as St. Louis since the other teams in the division are so poor. No one else is over .500, and the Giants and Rockies have essentially eliminated themselves from playoff contention. Arizona is in second at 4 back, but I don't think they're even that good. The Dodgers, 5 1/2 back, are the Padres' only threat such as it is. 85% we see the fourth different division winner in four years. Hey, if that trend continues, the Rockies will win next year!

NL Wild Card: The parity in the NL East could end up being the Cubs' biggest asset here as they fatten up on average Milwaukee, subpar Houston and Pittsburgh, and dire Cincinnati. Still, it's pretty wide open, with six teams within five games of each other. Advantage Chicago, but no better than 45%. Divide the rest however you want between all five NL East teams.

Superior talent trumps momentum again as Roy Oswalt conquers Coors and Craig Biggio and his ridiculous elbow armor march into history. (Although as my friend Ali pointed out, what's the big deal about the "modern" HBP record when the pre-1900 one, Hughie Jennings' 287, is only 20 higher than Don Baylor's mark and easily within Biggio's reach?)

No real highlights for the Rockies in this one (Todd Helton and Brad Hawpe did have a single and an extra-base hit each), so let's not dwell long. Who's going where today? First I want to soapbox a moment. If you are a Yankees fan (AND WERE BORN OR LIVE WITHIN ONE DAY'S DRIVING DISTANCE OF NEW YORK), I understand you might feel some consternation about your team's lukewarm performance thus far. (If you're a Yankees fan from say, Seattle, you're a bad human being. Like Cowboys fans from Chicago. What is that?) You have every right to expect your team's management to do whatever they can to improve themselves, especially given their investment on the season thus far.

This does not mean, however, that you are entitled to the players you need to get better, no matter what Peter Gammons says. Like Mark Kotsay. Why would the A's trade Kotsay to the Yankees when a) they're playing better than New York is right now and b) the Yankees' one decent prospect is a third baseman? Likewise the Cubs and Preston Wilson. Well, if we can't have "Johnny" Cedeño, and we can't have Todd Wellemeyer, we're packing up our marbles and going home. We're not taking Joe Borowksi and Mike Fontenot just because you will it so.

I think both the Cubs and Yankees are making a misevaluation of where the market is and where it's going to be. At this point a lot more teams are buyers than sellers, and a lot more teams than either are simply standing pat. You'd imagine extremely profitable Washington ought to be able to brook a payroll increase. Baltimore's fans should tar and feather Peter Angelos if he doesn't pop open the checkbook soon. Toronto is allegedly about to experience a cash infusion. Atlanta certainly has enough talent to spring for a rent-a-player here or there. It would be unlike White Sox GM Kenny Williams to let the deadline go by without making a move or two just for the sake of stealing the Cubs' headlines for a second. Right now you have to be figuring he's trying to think of a way to move Carl Everett so he can reacquire him at the deadline for the third consecutive year. It's also tradition that the Mets make at least one shortsighted, boneheaded move a year. David Wright for Russ Ortiz!

My point is, as uncomfortable as it is watching the Rockies team as presently constituted, he who laughs last laughs loudest. Preston Wilson is actually having himself a nice little bounceback year (13 homers, .807 OPS). OK, maybe he is .219/.267/.396 on the road. (Out-of-town GMs, you didn't hear that from me!) Still, in the perception of many still he is a difference-maker, and the market for legitimate power-hitting guys who can play anywhere in the outfield isn't crammed. There's no Carlos Beltran out there this season, that's for certain. Colorado doesn't have to trade anybody. If no one is willing to deal them more than the value of two high draft picks, they should sit the thing out. It's not like it's going to drive away (any more of) the fanbase.

Speaking of Carlos Beltran, has there been a bigger "superstar" free agent bust this year than he? Yes, there has, and his name is Adrian Beltre. The third baseman hit a long ball for the Mariners last night in Oakland, but he's slugging .380 and has only six homers all year. Just for fun, here's a short list of third base regulars who make less than Beltre's $11 million: Morgan Ensberg ($450k, 20 homers), Brandon Inge ($1.35m, .299/.384/.464), Joe Randa ($2.15m, 12 homers). In fact, among 20 batting-title qualified ML third basemen, Beltre ranks 16th in OPS. Even Vinny Castilla and the much-maligned Joe Crede are having better years. Eric Chavez took the first six weeks of the year essentially off and has easily passed Beltre since. No point to this really, other than to make fun of the Mariners. Ha ha, they used to be good, wouldn't spend the money to put themselves over the top, and now they're stuck in a division with the filthy rich Angels and teams that produce cheap pitchers (A's) and hitters (Rangers) like they were tap water. I will say that their TV commercials, which feature players as hosts in a Home Shopping Network parody, are very funny.

Well, I was supposed to go to this game and see Roger Clemens, Craig Biggio tying Don Baylor's all-time HBP record, and Garrett Atkins' big fly. Instead, I got a migraine and saw these painful flashing lights. With my eyes closed. At least I recovered in time to see the last few innings of the A's winning again.

I turned away from this one fairly soon, as it was obvious Jamey Wright had nothing and I wanted to watch the Padres-Dodgers game, which ended up being infinitely more interesting. Looking quickly at the box score, at looks like at least the top of the lineup had a good night, as Gonzalez, Atkins, and Helton all had two hits. Garrett Atkins is having a pretty good year, huh? His home/away splits are brutal though (1.087 home OPS vs. .548 on the road). Zany.

I was on the fence about going to the game tonight and then I realized: This could well be my last chance to see Roger Clemens pitch in person. Clemens may return for another year or even two in Houston, but there is no guarantee that he will start in Denver ever again. Seriously, if you can can make it to Coors tonight, do it. He's only the greatest pitcher of my lifetime, and in many people's opinions of all time. I don't really like him very much personally -- I'm a Curt Schilling guy -- but his portfolio is pretty undeniable. There's a debate over whether he should enter the Hall with a Red Sox or Yankees hat. I think they should just induct him twice, first the skinny, flighty Boston version and then the heavy, cranky New York version a few years later when he becomes eligible. It's up to the Veterans' Committee whether to let in the Blue Jay Clemens.

Update: According to ESPN Radio's Dan Patrick, Clemens can set a record tonight for the most consecutive scoreless road innings to begin a season. As if I needed further incentive!

Since I did write about the Astros just two series prior to this one, I thought I'd take a bit of a different tack and play ghost of Christmas future for a little while. The Astros are definitely sellers this year, although the nature of their frontline talent makes their strategy going forward a little unique. Seriously, can you imagine Craig Biggio finishing his career anywhere else? And what about that Clemens guy?

1B: Look, it's sad, but it's true. Jeff Bagwell's career is effectively over. It might be nice for him to try and make a comeback next year only so he and Biggio can enter the Hall of Fame together, but his days as a difference-maker are gone. Killer B's, we hardly knew ye. Lance Berkman has been playing first while recuperating from an injury of his own, but past that on the major league level it's thing one (Mike Lamb) and thing two (Jose Vizcaino). As you would expect for an organization that's had a franchise guy entrenched at the position since 1991, Houston has nothing coming down the pipeline at first. The only guy Baseball America has in their top 30 prospects is Todd Self, a lefthanded-hitting guy with a terrific batting eye and no power whatsoever. Nonetheless, Self will probably get to hold down the position for at least a year as the Astros look to upgrade here through trade or the draft.

2B: Biggio is back at his first adopted position this year (who else has a baseball card of him as a catcher?) as the bizarre center field experiment thankfully only lasted half a season. Not as bizarre as Tony Womack in the outfield, but still, with that messed up 430-foot hill, what were they thinking? His heir apparent, Chris Burke, is already in the majors. Burke is 25 and has a reputation for being a high-average guy with a great glove. Like a lot of the Astros' younger players, he'll be useful but not a star. They're going to have to get lucky or aggressive somewhere.

SS and 3B: Adam Everett had a good year last year and has been terrible in '05, Morgan Ensberg has been the opposite. Ensberg already has nearly twice as many homers as he did last year in half as many at-bats. Both of these guys are young and for the moment cheap, although Houston better hope the '03/'05 version of Ensberg is the real deal or else they're going to have no power on the infield whatsoever.

LF: Likely Berkman's for as long as he wants it. The Astros have a tradition of laying out the big bucks to keep hometown guys hometown, and after Biggio, Bagwell, and Clemens ride off into the sunset, Berkman will be the only high-profile connection left to the Astros' (very brief) Second Golden Age. Minute Maid Park should serve to boost his power numbers swinging righty.

CF: Is Willy Taveras the second coming of Vince Coleman or of Alex Sanchez? No one doubts Taveras's speed, but whether he can convert that single tool into a useful big league career is under scrutiny. Taveras also isn't a wonderful centerfielder for his speed. As an isolated roster spot Willy looks like he could be of some help, but the Astros have to be very nervous about having an entire team of table-setters and no big boppers.

RF: Maybe the most obvious spot for improvement besides the first base vacancy. Jason Lane is a corner outfielder with a centerfielder's bat, and despite bully predictions in the prospect guides, he hasn't really put it all together in the majors yet. If he can start turning some of his doubles into homers (hey, worked for Brian Roberts), he'll stick around. More likely this is where Houston will choose to pursue a veteran stick. If not, Mitch Einertson is probably their most interesting hitter in the low minors.

C: In hindsight, giving up John Buck in the Carlos Beltran trade might have been a fatal mistake. The Astros have nothing in the minors and so could settle for several more seasons of Brad Ausmus, named by Baseball Prospectus this year as "the worst regular in baseball."

SP: Roy Oswalt and a bunch of question marks. Andy Pettite is younger than you think (33) but given his injury history and winning pedigree, who knows if he wants to hang around with a bad Astros team after his contract is up next year. Roger Clemens would be obvious trade bait if he was anyone other than, you know, Roger Clemens. As it stands Houston could make a lot of money and gird their future position by continuing to fill the stands at Minute Maid for a year or two more of Rocket starts. The young guys, Brandon Backe and Wandy Rodriguez, are probably not the future. Backe has a better national reputation than his numbers merit, and should be traded while that still remains true. Rodriguez is just a guy. It gets better in the minors, where Houston has Ezequiel Astacio and lower down some guys like Troy Patton. If they could make a trade for a handful more starting prospects this year it couldn't hurt, but it's hard to say whom they have besides Clemens who would be of value to any contenders.

RP: Oh, right, Brad Lidge. Somebody might want him. Lidge is having another dominant year but he's 28 with a history of arm problems. Dan Wheeler could certainly step in the closer's role gracefully much as Lidge did for Octavio Dotel. Somehow Houston always seems to come up smelling roses when it comes to relief pitching prospects. Chad Qualls and Chad Harville are fairly young swing-and-miss guys as well. It's hard to predict who in the farm system might be of service since so many major league relievers start games in the minors. Mark McLemore and Chad Reineke are the current names to know. Yes, you probably already know the name Mark McLemore, but like Luis Gonzalez, this is a different one.

Jamey Wright and Wandy tonight, Jason Jennings and Roger Clemens Tuesday, Byung-Hyun and Oswalt Wednesday. Let's go, Colorado.

As interleague play wraps up and the All-Star Break draws into view, the baseball season is really starting to get interesting. The Red Sox are feeling real confident after a perfect road trip swung them into first place. The Cubs are jazzed with the return of Mark Prior and a victory in an intracity series commemorated with a celebrity-studded crosstown commuter flight. The A's finished off a sweep of the Giants by handing San Francisco their worst shutout loss ever. The Nationals are an amazing success on the field and at the ticket window; should they be looking to make additions? The Angels, despite their miserable offense, are seeing daylight between themselves and the sinking Rangers. The Yankees keep following every step forward with three steps back. Oh, and then there's the disrespected White Sox, owners of the best record and biggest division lead in baseball. Can they go all the way? They're from Chicago, for pete's sake! What's next, a Boston championship? Oh...yeah. (Many of these links require registration. Forgive me.)

In the baseball backwater of Denver, things move more slowly. The Rockies' sweep of the Royals, combined with the Devil Rays' poor showing against their neighbors to the southeast, gives Colorado only the third-worst record in baseball for the moment. Brian Fuentes may well be the Rockies' lone All-Star representative, as Troy Renck notes. Eddy Garabito will get an opportunity to play shortstop as Desi Relaford is apparently unable to play every day. I myself would give Luis Gonzalez a shot at short, what have the Rockies to lose, but what do I know.

The Rockies' bullpen is good all of a sudden, and this should illustrate a commonly overlooked principle: you can assemble a good relief staff on a shoestring budget. Ask Cleveland, Toronto, or Milwaukee. The trick is to try a little bit of everything, and to not be afraid to make plenty of changes as you go. If you can get a Miceli or Carvajal or Fuentes or Witasick for basically nothing, you can afford to jettison a complete disaster or two. Yes, I mean Matt Anderson. Someone please put this guy out of his misery.

We've got Houston coming in, and hopefully we'll treat them as badly in our house as they did us at theirs. The Astros' road record certainly supports it. I'll have to find some sort of new angle for the series preview, since I wrote about Houston so recently. We'll see how that goes. Might go to the game tonight. I don't often get the chance to show off my handsome Brad Lidge jersey now that I'm living out of NL Central country. Then again, I also would like to buy groceries this week. So I can, you know, eat.

For fun (and also because I am quite sick of George Frazier) I watched the game today with the sound off and my iPod on shuffle. The results were interesting.

Top of the first: As Joe Kennedy took the mound, the Stooges’ “Your Pretty Face is Going to [Heck]” comes on. That can’t be a good omen, I think, and it isn’t, as Joe first loads the bases then lets a grounder go right through him on its way to scoring two runs. Before Kennedy gets out of the inning, Bob Dylan’s “I Shall Be Released” (the version from Biograph) plays in its entirety. This could mean one of two things, I ponder. Either the Rockies are going to score a bunch of runs and get Joe off the hook, or he’s not long for this game.

Bottom of the first: Jose Lima’s entry theme is “Welcome to the Terrordome” by Public Enemy, and the terror in question I believe is in relation to Lima’s frightening blonde dye job. Or the fact that Eddy Garabito is the Rockies’ leadoff hitter today. Garrett Atkins doubles to the Dismemberment Plan’s “One Too Many Blows to the Head,” which may well be the explanation for Lima’s hair. Lima gets his glove knocked of by a Todd Helton liner just in time for the trombone solo. His facial expression after Helton reaches on the infield hit looks appropriate for trombone accompaniment. Preston Wilson knocks the Rockies’ first run as “Brooklyn Zoo” by ODB kicks in. I don’t know what this presages. Maybe a trade to New York? Anyway, Helton scores on a groundout as Ol’ Dirty taunts Lima. I can’t here repeat how, but it sure made me laugh.

Top of the second: Calexico’s funky instrumental “Attack El Robot! Attack!” is on as we resume play, and strangely there are motorycles on the field. The promotional significance of this escapes me because I don’t have the sound on. Next, as Lima singles with one out, we have “Temporarily Blind” by Built to Spill. Now I’m going to watch the ball-strike calls very closely. Nothing controversial occurs, though, as David DeJesus lines to Helton, who tags a sheepish Lima out for an easy double play.

Bottom of the second: “Come Around,” Sugar. But what’s coming around? The Rockies’ offense? Lima’s season? Clint Hurdle’s shocking midgame firing? Maybe it’s J.D. Closser’s bat; the onscreen statistics seem to bear it out. Or maybe not, he pops up. Joe Kennedy lays down a sacrifice bunt. Uh-oh, here we have “Refugee,” by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. Not too difficult to apply that to the current situation. On cue, Garabito flies out to strand the runner.

Top of the third: No Frank White on Frazier’s list of the top five all-time Royals? Anyway, the soundtrack for this inning is Radiohead’s “We [Blank] Young Blood,” which is what their respective leagues are doing to the pink-cheeked Royals and Rockies. Kennedy goes 1-2-3, how ‘bout that?

Bottom of the third: Yo La Tengo’s “Double Dare,” as Shane Costa robs Atkins of a double. Lima goes 1-2-3 too.

Top of the fourth: Death Cab For Cutie’s “Surprisingly, Kennedy Continues to Cruise.” OK, I made that up, it’s “Little Fury Bugs.”

Bottom of the fourth: Over the commercial we had “I Got a Woman,” by Ray Charles, which doesn’t have anything to do with baseball but sure gets you moving in your seat. Next up: The Descendents’ “Mr. Bass.” OK, it’s a song about a fish, I got nothing there. The lack of synergy is really hurting the Rockies’ offense, as Lima sets them down in order once again.

Top of the fifth: The Vines, “Autumn Shade.” Well, I assure you come autumn no one on the national scene is going to be paying attention to either of these teams. Perhaps I’m stretching a bit. As Jurassic 5’s “I Am Somebody” livens the mood in my living room, Alberto Castillo livens up the game by singling. My sources however tell me that Castillo is not somebody. Ben Folds kicks into “You To Thank” and we have Lima to thank as he fails to get a bunt down and the Royals mount no further threat.

Bottom of the fifth: By this time I’m wondering if I turn the shuffle off and start picking songs manually I can affect the teams’ play. Maybe next game. Closser singles and Kennedy executes his second sacrifice of the afternoon. The Replacements’ “Bent Out of Shape” is the song and Lima certainly looks so on the replay from the last half-inning, after he struck out bunting. For the second time this game, Colorado gets an infield single off of Jose Lima’s glove as Atkins sends Closser home. A long Todd Helton at-bat takes almost the whole length of Joy Division’s “Disorder,” but it ends happily as Todd doubles down the rightfield line to score Atkins. Momentary disorder ensues in the visitors’ dugout as the Royals start getting some relievers up. “Reconnez Cherie,” Wreckless Eric, starts going as Preston Wilson steps in. Hmm, maybe a trade to Washington, formerly from that French-speaking Canadian province? Preston draws the unintentional intentional walk. Brad Hawpe walks, too, and Elvis Costello’s “That’s How You Got Killed Before” comes on. I hope this means what I think it does. It’s the end of the line for Lima, at least. It looks like Andy Sisco will be the Royals’ next pitcher. He’ll enter to Led Zeppelin’s “The Immigrant Song,” which seems appropriate enough for a Rule 5 guy. Sisco strikes out pinch-hitter Dustan Mohr, but the Rockies have gotten Joe Kennedy his lead.

Top of the sixth: “Be Mine,” by R.E.M. I’m not sure if I’m ready to ask Joe Kennedy to go steady quite yet, but he keeps this up, who knows. With two outs, Joe gives up a single to Mark Teahen, and I burst out laughing as a song by Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg, of which two of the three words in the title are inappropriate, bursts out and Kennedy notches his sixth strikeout. Ha ha, Royals ain’t [blank] but [blank] and [blank].

Bottom of the sixth: Kid Million’s “Unwanted Toy.” Kid Million were a mid-‘90s band from my hometown of Chicago, and this song could apply to Sisco, who the Cubs didn’t want. Desi Relaford draws a walk and steals second. Closser moves Relaford over with a flyout, and…what’s this, Kennedy is going to hit for himself. OK, Clint. But hey look, the Rockies perfectly execute the suicide squeeze, and it’s 5-2. It’s Dylan again, “Maggie’s Farm,” and I’m not sure what to make of that. The relationship between Hurdle and Dan O’Dowd, perhaps: “He gives you a nickel and he gives you a dime, and he asks you if you’re having a good time.” The Rockies are playing like a pocketful of shiny quarters today, as Garabito and Atkins follow the sacrifice play with back-to-back singles. A coach’s visit to the mound is underscored by 2Pac’s “Keep Ya Head Up,” which is kind of funny. Either the coach’s words or 2Pac’s must have done the trick, because Sisco pops out Helton to end the inning.

Top of the seventh: Alejandro Escovedo’s “The Last to Know” includes a phrase that could be applied to Dan Miceli, now up in the Colorado bullpen: “more miles than money.” Apparently I am the last to know that Joe Kennedy has been replaced by a strike-throwing lefty cyborg from the future. Seriously, this is the best he’s looked all year. His pitch count is under a hundred, too -- he could finish this thing.

Bottom of the seventh: “Tho Dem Wrappas,” by noted Cardinal fan Nelly. He’s obviously referring to Kennedy’s curveball, which has wrapped nicely to the fringes of the strike zone all day today. On TV some kids are”tho”-ing things from the press box into the stands below. Leo Nuñez -- the Leo Nuñez â€" is on the mound for Kansas City. “Angel” by Belly is the next song to come up and amazingly, Dustan Mohr, originally drafted by the Angels in 1994, hits a homer. OK, he didn’t sign, but still, that’s pretty cool. Superchunk’s “Becoming a Speck” follows, obviously regarding the Royals’ chances of pulling out a victory in this one. Poor Nuñez is getting brutalized out there as Desi Relaford smokes one to right for a triple.

Top of the eighth: The title track from Nick Drake’s Bryter Layter plays over the commercials and the very beginning of the inning, as Jay Witasick takes the bump for the Rockies. Like any good Colo-blogger would, I will take this as proof of the Rockies’ bright future. Next track is Elvis Costello’s “Girls Talk,” for which I have nothing. If you’re a girl and were talking about the Rockies during the top of the eighth of today’s game, please let me know. I must be hitting a cold streak, because as Witasick is walking Tony Graffanino, “The Abandoned Hospital Ship” by the Flaming Lips starts up. I don’t have any idea what any of the Flaming Lips’ songs are about, let alone what their tenuous connections to Colorado baseball may be. Maybe something about the disabled list somehow?

Bottom of the eighth: “After This Time is Gone,” by Eleventh Dream Day, which is just a flat-out great song. Let’s see -- after this game, I will probably watch another baseball game. I may have a bowl of cereal. And I will almost certainly go get another Diet Coke. Mike MacDougal enters to pitch for the Royals to another classic, Yo La Tengo’s “As the Hour Grows Late.” It’s the bottom of the eighth -- the hour could hardly be later. Ooh, and MacDougal pegs Eddy Garabito, right in the small of the back. That looked like it hurt. The Clash’s “The Guns of Brixton” is the soundtrack for the Rockies piling it on, as Atkins doubles to score two. He’s having a nice little game. I would have to say he and Kennedy have been the biggest beneficiaries of the iPod experiment thus far. Nirvana’s “Pennyroyal Tea" hmm, that one stumps me. Good song, though. Still nobody out as Helton walks and Wilson steps up again. Let’s see, where’s he going to be traded this inning? Well, his song is The Orb’s “Pomme Fritz,” so to England, I guess. Or to A Huge Evergrowing Pulsating Brain That Rules from the Center of the Ultraworld. Wilson walks and there’s still nobody out. The Royals finally get a force at home on a Brad Hawpe ground ball. Ooh, and new reliever Jonah Bayliss plunks Desi to force in another run. Rockies 9, Royals 2.

Top of the ninth: I swear upon all that is holy that I am not making this up: Entering the triumphant final half-inning of this convincing sweep, the iPod coughed out Prince’s “Purple Rain.” Really. No, really. I haven’t made anything up so far, so why would I now? I was hoping that that Orb song was Björk, because Preston Wilson being traded to Iceland is much funnier than England, and I really couldn’t tell at first. But I stuck to the truth. And it’s all paid back in spades. Come to think of it, why don’t they play “Purple Rain” after every Rockies home win the way they do “Dirty Water” in Boston or “Na Na, Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye” on the South Side of Chicago? I guess all of those extended lighters would constitute some kind of fire hazard. Great, great song though. And a pretty nice win, too. Remember, the Royals swept the Yankees earlier this season. Anyway, David Cortes comes in to mop up for Colorado over the funkin' strains of OutKast's "Player's Ball." Bring on the Astros! Oh, wait, Matt Anderson is coming in with two out and nobody on. Well, I supposed it can't hurt for him to pitch to a batter or two in a low-leverage situation. To Superchunk's "Tiny Bombs," Matt Stairs hits a pinch-hit two-run homer. Terrence Long singles, and finally Anderson induces a lineout to end it. Well, that could have could have gone a little more smoothly. We'll take the W's any way they come.

Jeff Francis pitched another excellent home game, the Rockies' offense coaxed out some runs in the most torturous possible fashion, and the Colorado bullpen turned in another effortless performance in dispatching the Royals. Runelvys Hernandez walked three straight in the second, two with the bases loaded, and Garrett Atkins added a sacrifice fly as the Rockies scored all the runs they would need early. An Atkins double in the eighth added Colorado's final run.

Francis allowed six hits and one walk leading to two earned runs in seven solid. Jay Witasick and Brian Fuentes pitched the eighth and ninth, setting down all six batters they faced. Sure, it's only the Royals, but it still warms the heart to see the Rockies pitch this well. Too bad about Jason Jennings, Joe Kennedy, and Jamey Wright.

Mike DeJean is coming back to Colorado, and it's by choice. As Tracy Ringolsby notes, DeJean is the third pitcher after Jay Witasick and Dan Miceli to be pursued and lost by the Rockies during the offseason, only to sign with them after being released elsewhere. Clint Hurdle is under fire (although not from upper management). In Hurdle's defense, his team is not good. It's not as if Lou Piniella, a terrific manager, has had much success making a silk purse out of the Devil Rays. Wait until Hurdle starts losing with good players, then fire him.

I seem to recall several years ago the Cubs began a season with a home losing streak so profound that they eventually elected to try wearing their road grays at home. It didn't work, but it's a shame that the Rockies can't try a reverse ploy (road teams are never allowed to wear white), because as soon as they put on the white-and-purple-stripes, they're like an entirely different club. It's eerie.

Byung-Hyun Kim wasn't magnificent -- he allowed a lot of baserunners and threw a ton of pitches for 5 2/3 innings -- but he got the job done as Colorado scored early and often against D.J. Carrasco. Dustan Mohr got it going with a two-run homer in the second, and Garrett Atkins and Brad Hawpe added three hits apiece. It didn't affect the outcome, but Todd Helton looked great going opposite field for an RBI single in the seventh. Helton added two of the Rockies' eight walks as well. 13 hits and 8 walks is good.

Kansas City, on the other hand, despite the best efforts of the munificent Mr. Kim, only managed to draw two bases on balls. What's more, they garnered only one extra-base hit the whole way. That's not just bad, it's freaky. Jimmy Gobble, just returned from AAA, pitched pretty well for the Royals (4 strikeouts in 1 1/3) but was hung out to dry by Leo Nuñez, who relieved him and promptly allowed all of his inherited runners to score. Colorado by contrast received encouraging work from Marcos Carvajal, Dan Miceli, and Bobby Seay who combined to allow only one run over the last 3 1/3. Seay struck out the side for a perfect ninth.

The "perfect night" I had going yesterday didn't quite turn out as planned, as the Angels and Mariners both ended up winning pretty big. Still, I watched parts of four games yesterday (Cubs-Sox, Mets-Yankees, Rockies-Royals, and A's-Giants), and my preferred team won in each case. I'm feeling lucky.

Of course, luck is often the residue of design. Just ask Liverpool, my favorite Premiership Football side. I wrote earlier in the year about the weird situation the Reds found themselves in regarding next season's Champions League tournament. See, Liverpool won this year -- beat AC Milan in Istanbul on penalty kicks, in a thriller -- but technically failed to qualify to return to defend their title by finishing fifth in the English league. (They were edged out by regional rivals Everton, which is sort of like the Mets ousting the Yankees, only Liverpool is not completely evil as far as I know.)

To avoid the embarrassing situation of having their defending champions out of the running before the games even start, UEFA have bent the rules and allowed Liverpool in. However, no first round bye is in effect. While AC Milan, Real Madrid, and fellow English teams Arsenal and Chelsea get to skip the three qualifying rounds, the Reds have been thrown in at the very bottom of the draw, in a bracket that includes clubs from Luxembourg, Azerbaijan, Malta, and the Faroe Islands. Yes, the Faroe Islands. I don't know where they are either.

Curiously, though, Liverpool will play Total Network Solutions (their real name), a club from Wales. I know European geography is not the strong suit of many Americans, but Wales is pretty close to England. A lot closer than Kazakhstan, anyhow. Qualifying rounds involve two-game home-and-home series, so rather than having to fly to Armenia or Belarus, Liverpool gets a two-hour bus ride to Llansantffraid (still not making these names up). It's funny how these things work themselves out.

It's been a really good day for baseball. The Rockies are up big against Kansas City. The White Sox thrashed the Cubs. The Mets set a dubious record while beating the Yankees. The Orioles finally fell out of first place. Just as I was writing this, Bobby Kielty hit a homer to extend the A's lead on the Giants. It's just one of those rare days where all the teams I like seem to be winning and all the teams I hate seem to be taking it on the chin. If the Brewers and Padres hang on and the Dodgers break their tie against Anaheim, it'll be a miraculous clean sweep. How often do all the non-A's AL West teams, the Yankees, and the Cubs lose on the same day?

Since I'm feeling so chipper, how about an unscheduled trade winds update? I don't believe we've linked CBS SportsLine's trade rumor ticker before, so there that is. They list Preston Wilson and Joe Kennedy, as you'd expect, but dig this: "Wilson may be the best player available right now...the Rockies might have to eat some salary to make a deal, but not as much as originally expected." Well, that's nice to hear. Listed as Wilson possibilities: Atlanta, Los Angeles, Baltimore, Washington, Texas, and the Cubs. Listed as Kennedy destinations: Oakland, Texas, Los Angeles, San Francisco.

SI.com's trade block pictorial features Wilson (listing the Orioles as the frontrunning suitor), Kennedy (with scads of possibilities: the Yankees, Baltimore, the White Sox, Atlanta, Florida, the Mets), and one of the least flattering photos of Todd Helton you'll ever see, which is saying something. The Red Sox and Yankees are said to be the teams after Todd.

Hey, one more random feel-good story: It looks like Rick Ankiel is making something of his new career as an outfielder after all.

Who else, contemplating a matchup between the two worst teams Major League Baseball has to offer, thought immediately of the immortal words of Bubblegum Tate: "Nothing! There is nothing at stake and no threat...beyond the shame of defeat." The Royals rank 27th in OPS, 27th in ERA, and 29th in winning percentage. They're also tied for first in manager firings. Kansas City's roster is a lot like Colorado's: a lot of rookies, a lot of quadruple-A guys, a few veterans no one else wanted, and a great first baseman waiting to be traded.

Mike Sweeney of course is the first baseman, and like Todd Helton, he's the classy face of a terrible team. He's having a better year than Helton, though. He'll miss this series (registration required) with a torn ligament in his left wrist. Matt Stairs is having the best season among the veteran nomads of the Royals roster, and career minor leaguer Emil Brown is doing a decent impersonation of a major league regular in right field.

The Kansas City pitching staff is built on the Detroit model of calling up pitchers too soon, then jerking them randomly and rapidly between starting, relieving, and the minors. 21-year-old Zack Greinke is taking a beating in the majors this year for no particularly good reason. D.J. Carrasco and Runelvys Hernandez, who will start the first two games of this three-game weekend series at Coors, are two lesser products of the KC-Omaha connection. The always entertaining, though seldom effective, Jose Lima will take the mound in Sunday's game.

No fewer than 21 pitchers have put in at least an appearance for Kansas City this year, including luminaries like Steve Stemle, Jonah Bayliss, Leo Nuñez, and Ambiorix Burgos. Andy Sisco, a gangly Rule 5 pickup from the Cubs' organization, is having a very good year out of the bullpen. Other than that, they've got nothing.

The Rockies are a different team at home than on the road; the Royals are just generally not very good. Granted, Byung-Hyun Kim and Joe Kennedy will start in this series, so no guarantees. Jeff Francis, who goes on Saturday, has an awfully good chance to get back on track. You know what everybody knows about the Royals -- you just can't let Emil Brown beat you.

Beset with trade possibilities on all sides, the Rockies are exercising restraint, which is admirable. Their scouts seem to be paying attention, too. They've asked the Cubs for Todd Wellemeyer, a potential starter whose good changeup could be useful at Coors. They're also asking for the Marlins to send back Guillermo Mota in a Brian Fuentes deal -- about that I'm not so sure. Mota might be one of those LaTroy Hawkins types who just doesn't have the head for closing. Dan O'Dowd seems to be of the opinion that no one save Preston Wilson has to go, which hopefully means that as we get closer to the deadline, and teams like Baltimore and the Cubs get more desperate, the Rockies wring some really good prospects out of their serviceable veterans.

I don't really have anything to say about this one. I could make something up about having boycotted the game in protest of the Rockies' sublime ineptitude, but you guys are smarter than that. I was watching the "X-Files" marathon on Sci-Fi.

The Post this morning has a real depressing piece about Todd Helton's struggles. Dan O'Dowd: "I really don't know why it's happened." Troy Renck notes that there's no obvious flaw in Helton's swing or approach. Nonetheless, three of Helton's eight worst offensive months ever have come this year. He's hitting .149 against lefthanders. He's still not asking for a trade (registration required), though.

Todd Greene and Aaron Miles aren't quite ready yet, so Ryan Shealy will get a couple more major league swings.

The Marlins have interest in Brian Fuentes, according to the South Florida Sun-Sentinel. Shortstop Josh Wilson and righty Yorman Bazardo are what they're offering. The Rockies almost certainly don't want to deal Fuentes, but Florida might have interest in one of Colorado's starters, Jennings, Chacon, or Kennedy. Keeping that in mind, Wilson is an OBP-friendly guy with a bit of speed and not a lot of power. His future in the big leagues might be as a second baseman. Bazardo is young (20) for AA but his strikeout rates are teeny for a guy said to throw 98. I wouldn't sacrifice Fuentes for that combo but anything the Rockies could get for Jennings or Kennedy would be a positive.

It doesn't have anything to do with the Rockies or baseball, but it's Joss Whedon's birthday. Well, it matters to me.

Clint Hurdle stupidly pressed his luck with Jamey Wright, and the Rockies went down in ignominious defeat once again. Wright got through six innings allowing four runs, and despite the bullpen being the Rockies' sole strength this year and recent acquisition Dan Miceli being eminently available, Hurdle left Wright out there even with two men on base to give up the inevitable, obligatory game-losing double to Lance Berkman. But at least Hurdle saved Jay Witasick and David Cortes for the next time the Rockies have a late-inning road lead, a month or so from now.

Brad Hawpe's homer, Todd Helton's triple, and Luis Gonzalez's 2-for-5 night were wasted as the Rockies were at least able to bunch together their baserunners for once. After Wright fell behind 4-0, Colorado came back with a four-run sixth marked by Jason Lane's case of brain lock. Helton knocked in Gonzalez in the seventh to give the Rockies a short-lived lead. Jamey bleepin' Wright!

Moving on, mercifully: Todd Greene and Aaron Miles should be back (see Footnotes at the bottom) before the end of next week. It will be interesting to see what this will mean for Danny Ardoin, who I will begrudgingly admit has played well, and Luis Gonzalez, who again has demonstrated something many of us closer Rockies observers already knew: he's better than Aaron Miles. My best guess is that the Rockies will temporarily send Ardoin down to give Greene the starting job so they can showcase him for a potential trade. Whatever they do, they won't jeopardize their fiendish plan to eat up a year of J.D. Closser's major league service time without actually giving him a significant number of at-bats against big league pitching.

In the infield, Eddy Garabito will certainly be sent back down to the minors while Miles will probably supplant Gonzalez on the depth chart. Maybe he'll even go back to hitting leadoff. Shudder. It's indicative of how poorly the Rockies' roster is constructed that Gonzalez, a useful middle infielder, may make the bulk of his starts the rest of the season at first base and the corner outfield spots. They obviously have a few better options (we just saw two of them, Ryan Shealy and Jorge Piedra), but they spent good money on Dustan Mohr and Desi Relaford and seem disinclined to release either or both of them if they can't be traded. Imagine if they'd elected not to spend free agent money on replacement-level players and instead taken a flier on a last-chancin' starter/middle reliever type (like Esteban Loaiza, who is cleaning up in my MLB 2K5 season). Yeah, they'd still be pretty bad. But perhaps Clint Hurdle wouldn't have to sacrifice winnable games on the altar of Jamey Wright's fragile psyche.

The Cincinnati Reds today canned manager Dave Miley, making them the second team this year not as bad as the Rockies to fire their skipper. The Reds were at least supposed to be within hailing distance of competitive this year, but instead they're 27-43, even farther back in their division (18 1/2 games) than Colorado are in theirs (16). This is entirely a product of the Cardinals being quite a bit better than the Padres, but nonetheless, neither team is in line for a sudden reversal of fortune.

Miley doesn't really deserve the blame for the Reds' failures. That would be GM Dan O'Brien, who added Ramon Ortiz and Eric Milton to a team that won 76 games last year and claimed that this made them contenders. Cincinnati has been headed backwards for a while, a trend masked by a rather lucky first half of 2004 (their Pythagorean record was 66-96). Their management tendencies in the past few years have been marked by some hideous contracts (Sean Casey, the out-for-the-season Paul Wilson, in hindsight Ken Griffey) and a peculiar inability to develop anything but corner outfielders (Adam Dunn, Ryan Freel, Austin Kearns, Wily Mo Peña).

As the Cincinnati Post's Lonnie Wheeler wrote earlier today in a prophetic column, it's the pitching that sealed Miley's fate. Milton has been astonishingly bad, running up a 7.82 ERA and allowing an unreal 25 homers. Ben Weber, brought in to shore up the bullpen, allowed 11 runs in 12 1/3 and promptly went on the disabled list. Brandon Claussen and Aaron Harang have been the only thing approaching major league starters the team has, as Ortiz has been crummy (6.51 ERA) and none of the group of Matt Belisle, Luke Hudson, and the musically named Elizardo Ramirez has distinguished themselves. And then there's the Danny Graves debacle....

All this adds up to is a badly-run franchise giving a good baseball man his walking papers as an excuse for their own incompetence. Jerry Narron takes the reigns from Miley. The former Rangers manager will have his work cut out for him keeping this sinking ship from beating the Rockies to 100 losses.

Preston Wilson to the Cubs (registration required) rumors persist, as Chicago came dangerously close to falling to .500 this week and their unloved crosstown siblings continue to win as if it's going out of style. Meanwhile (and although our interest in them died out with the Venison Incident), AL and NL All-Star Voting results show that most of the major oversights are on their way to being corrected. Do go vote for Paul Lo Duca and Mark Texeira if you get a chance, as Mike Piazza and Tino Martinez certainly don't deserve to start in their places.

We haven't taken a look at the NL West race for a while, seeing as we've been out of it since the first road trip of the season. The Padres beat the Dodgers and the Diamondbacks fell to the Giants as one of those periodic divisional round-robins began yesterday. As it stands today the Padres are in first at 39-31, while Arizona is 4 1/2 back, the Dodgers 5 1/2, and San Francisco an even 9. The Giants have already written off their season, and early overachievers Arizona, losers of five in a row, are working their way off the map as we speak. I expect it'll come down to the Southern California teams, and younger, healthier San Diego has the edge. Eric Gagne could be lost for the year to Los Angeles, who also have a finger injury to Milton Bradley with which to contend. The LA Times' Tim Brown writes about the confusing state of the trade market, mentioning that "for prospects, one could have just about any Colorado Rocky." That's not exactly true, Tim, and please: there is no correct singular form of "Rockies," like "White Sox" or "Heat."

Reluctantly, we return to the local beat. With the Devil Rays' victory in New York, the Rockies are now officially the worst road team in baseball, although thanks to the exchange of some young relievers for old, they are no longer the youngest...Joe Kennedy has an option left, meaning he could well be sent down to Colorado Springs after Shawn Chacon completes his rehab assignment there...Ryan Shealy will not return with the big league club to Denver, but he appreciated his brief stint in the Show. Also: The Rockies want Ronny Cedeno (misidentified by the News as "Johnny") from the Cubs in a potential Wilson trade, have signed Aquilino Lopez to a minor league deal, and may pursue Mike DeJean, released by the Mets.

This one wasn't as close as the score, as they say. The Rockies' bats seemed to have missed the team plane as Andy Pettite sleepwalked through seven innings, allowing five hits, walking one, and striking out eight. Joe Kennedy gave up six earned, and Colorado didn't bother trying against John Franco in the eighth and Chad Qualls in the ninth. Pretty miserable, except for another two hits for the suddenly frisky Preston Wilson and doubles for Atkins and Relaford. Watching Matt Anderson pitch the eighth (two walks including one with the bases loaded, an infield hit, and a hit batsman) was like painful cranial surgery without anesthesia. Please, no more last chances for this bum.

The Astros got some charge out of their offensive stars of yore, as Craig Biggio, Adam Everett, and fresh-off-the-DL Lance Berkman had two hits each. All they really needed was Berkman's solo homer, as the Rockies didn't threaten against Pettite for even a minute.

But tomorrow: Wandy!

The Astros have a lot in common with the Rockies -- a miserable road record, a scuffling offense, a wacky home park. Their offense ranks dead last in the NL in OPS to Colorado's ninth. They're also 15th in homers, last in batting average, last in OBP, and last in runs scored. Their pitching hasn't been great either (9th in the league in ERA, although second in strikeouts per nine innings). They've played better after an ugly start, though, and the overall attitude in Houston seems more hopeful than it is here in Denver.

Essentially the team has been carried, such as it is, by the performance of three starters you may have heard of, Roger Clemens (1.53 ERA, 0.95 WHIP), Roy Oswalt (2.72, 1.09), and Andy Pettite (3.76, 1.21). They still rank only 8th in the NL in starters' ERA, however, because Brandon Backe and a whole bunch of stiffs haven't done much of a job in the fourth and fifth spots. The Rockies will see Pettite and Clemens Monday and Wednesday but draw Wandy Rodriguez (yes, his real name) for the Tuesday contest.

The loss of Jeff Bagwell, a stalwart in Houston since 1991, certainly hasn't helped the Astros' offense. Even Bagwell, who may be done for good with a degenerative shoulder condition, wouldn't have made this sad bunch much better. Third baseman Morgan Ensberg (16 homers, .271/.369/.538) is the only guy on the whole team putting up major league-starter numbers. Craig Biggio, with a career OBP of .373, is down to .322 on the season. Willy Taveras has some speed, but no pop, and he doesn't walk. Mike Lamb, Jason Lane, Adam Everett, and Chris Burke are all regulars with sub-.300 OBPs. In short, you can pitch to these guys.

The Astros' bullpen can be touched. They have an aggregate ERA of 4.47 and WHIP of 1.44. The top two guys, Brad Lidge and Dan Wheeler, are strikeout machines, but Chad Qualls, Chad Harville, Russ Springer, and the 145-year-old John Franco are hittable. The Rockies have not been real impressive this season when it comes to getting into the fleshy part of opponents' bullpens; they probably won't against Clemens or Pettite. Wandy?

The Rockies will start Joe Kennedy, Jamey Wright, and Jason Jennings, in that order. You know the story on these guys. They'll get hit a lot, and if the stars align properly, maybe they'll go six innings and give the Rockies a chance to be in the ballgame. Against the Astros' anemic attack, the chances are a little better than usual. Kennedy in particular could really use a good outing, so that Colorado can hurry up and trade him. I know Joe had a good year for the Rockies last year, but the sudden plunge in ERA and spike in strikeout rate from last year seem more and more like big, hairy flukes with each 2005 Kennedy appearance.

Just another road loss marked by complete offensive ineptitude. Jeff Francis struck out eight in six innings but gave up a homer to Rafael Palmeiro that turned out to be the difference in the sixth. Preston Wilson homered for Colorado, but the Rockies managed a sum total of five hits off of Hayden Penn and nothing against the Baltimore bullpen. I really have no suggestions at this point, besides Get Better Players. And take some more pitches.

In the midst of the Brendan Donnelly imbroglio, former Rockies reliever Curtis Leskanic admits many pitchers, at least at altitude, were guilty of the same sin: "I think you should be fined if you don't use pine tar when you're pitching at Coors Field"...Shawn Chacon feels that three rehab starts in his comeback from a strained left hamstring are excessive...Tracy Ringolsby notes that a Jason Jennings trade may be a longshot, Brad Hawpe is a gamer, and the Rockies' poor attendance numbers are a matter of perspective.

Nothing exciting on the trade-rumor front today, unless you count idle speculation about Preston Wilson to the White Sox. Later: Astro-nomics.

As penance for my not realizing he was even back with the big club until he had several at-bats under his belt, here's your Jorge Piedra Naming the No-Names report.

Jorge Moises Piedra is a rarity, an American high school player who went undrafted and yet made his way to the major leagues. Born 4/17/79 in California, Piedra signed with the Dodgers organization in 1997. After hitting well for average but not much power in single A, Piedra was traded to the Cubs for Ismael Valdez mid-2000. His career in the high minors has been somewhat erratic. He began to hit for power in AA West Tenn in 2001, but his on-base skills abandoned him. A poor start in 2002 saw him traded to the Rockies and demoted to High-A Salem, where he managed to consolidate his power (13 homers) and average (.301).

A third go-round in AA proved to be the charm, as Piedra connected for a career-high 18 home runs and put together a .275/.342/.513 line. The rarified air of Colorado Springs helped to continued improvement (.334/.372/.557) and a first audition with the parent club (3 homers, .297/.340/.484 in 91 ABs) in 2004.

Cory Sullivan beat Piedra out for a roster spot entering this season, although Jorge managed a pinch hit during a brief cameo in Denver after Dustan Mohr's April injury. A further setback came April 11th when Piedra was suspended for 10 days under the terms of the new performance-enhancing drug agreement. He accepted the suspension and responsbility for taking painkillers he claimed he was unaware would cause a positive test result.

His season has since proceeded without incident, as he's compiled a .312/.372/.527 line at Colorado Springs with 6 homers and 45 RBIs. The experts are divided on Piedra, as you would expect from his inconsistent minor league record. "I've seen him twice," writes John Sickels in The Baseball Prospect Book 2004, "and one time he looked like a future batting champion, and the other time he looked like he couldn't hit himself out of a wet paper bag." The 2005 Scouting Notebook expresses confidence in Piedra's offense (seeing him as a fourth outfielder or even the lefty half of a platoon) and defense (believing him to be able to play center in the majors, which the Rockies apparently don't). The tools hounds at the Baseball America Prospect Handbook haven't seen fit to rank him in their top 30 for the Rockies' organization three years running, although he doesn't fit the profile of the sort of players they like.

Piedra's biggest asset at this point is his age (26). He's probably not going to edge out Sullivan, Hawpe, or Holliday for a starting job, but his versatility afield and left-handed bat could make him an extremely useful bench player. He'll get plenty of opportunities to prove he belongs in the majors later this season after Preston Wilson (certainly) and Dustan Mohr (probably) are traded. At the moment, his existence in the system begs the question of why the Rockies are periodically playing Luis Gonzalez in the outfield. Who knows why this team does anything they do.

Well, it would have been another 2-1 victory had it not been for those eight consecutive baserunners who reached in the fourth. "He couldn't change speed or direction, and he didn't locate the ball that well," Clint Hurdle said of Byung-Hyun Kim. But what do you really think about him, Clint?

Eddy Garabito hit a two-run shot, the first of his career, Todd Helton had two doubles, and Luis Gonzalez and Ryan Shealy had two hits apiece. Marcos Carvajal was impressive in an extended bullpen appearance, allowing one run and striking out five in three and two-thirds. Rockies pitchers only walked two. Matt Anderson even pitched a scoreless inning, although the mercy rule may have been in effect at that point.

The Rockies managed nine hits but only two runs against Sidney Ponson, which is really not very good. He didn't walk anybody, which is just terrible. Hurdle was very slow to pull the trigger in the 4th when it became painfully clear that BK had batting-practice stuff, but the Rockies offense rolled over as it usually does on the road. Et tu, Preston Wilson? 0 for 3 with two strikeouts?

A friend of mine in the Bay Area instant messaged to say he had seen the SkySox playing the Sacramento River Cats in a rare AAA TV game, and he wondered how Colorado Springs could be so inept, striking out ten times against career minor-leauger Jimmy Serrano. Because their starting lineup is in Denver, I replied. Starting in Denver. The Rockies weren't going to be good this year anyway, but with injuries to Chacon, Greene, Barmes, Holliday, Tsao, and Miles it'll be a minor miracle if they avoid losing 110. Now if they'd stop fooling around with Garabito and Ardoin and Dustan Mohr and take their medicine like it's coming to them, I'd be much gratified. I'm giving them a mulligan on this year. If they're this ghastly against next season, heads are going to roll.

As a lifelong bad golfer, it's a real treat to watch all of these big shots completely airmail green after green.

Here's a surprising stat (third item): Slightly more than half of the Rockies' games have been decided by two runs or less, and their record is 7-11 in one-run games and 6-9 in two-run games. From this I suppose you could gather that they've been a little unlucky and could have come out on top a few more times in these close matches, but they'd still be 9-23 in games decided by three runs or more.

I'm not entirely sure, but I don't think "offensively flirtatious" means what Troy E. Renck thinks it does...Eddy Garabito never got his shot in his Baltimore...this notes column has a lot of interesting tidbits. Dan Miceli is in and Blaine Neal is out, not surprisingly. Aaron Cook is set to return after the All-Star break, it'll be interesting to see if the Rockies can go with a modified four-man rotation until then. Jay Payton for Dustan Mohr is under discussion, although Payton is raising quite a stink in Boston about not playing every day. There's no reason to assume he would do so in Denver, either. Tampa Bay's Alex Gonzalez and Pedro Astacio, late of the Rangers, are acquisition possibilities as well. As far as Gonzalez goes, the Rockies would do just as well sticking with Relaford, Garabito, and Luis Gonzalez at short, as Alex Gonzalez is a) more expensive and b) not better than any of those guys. As far as Astacio or any other pitcher with a modicum of big-league credibility goes,  hey, step right up.

I don't put a of stock in a lot of baseball's superstitious mythologies, but one thing that I do think is true is that the ninth inning is just different. Not every pitcher has the makeup to take the mound in the final inning of a close game and take care of business. Tonight was the biggest test of the season for Brian Fuentes. After "Jason" Jennings and Jay Witasick combined to dominate the Baltimore hitters through eight, Fuentes came out to hold down a 2-0 lead in the most difficult conditions imaginable. 50,000 Baltimore fans were screaming for his head. The Rockies' road woes, and his blown save in Cleveland earlier in the week, must have weighed heavily upon his shoulders. He risked permanent eye damage from the blinding ugliness of the Orioles' black-and-orange alternate jerseys. And somehow, the happiest surprise of the Rockies' pitching staff this season came through.

Fuentes overcame a leadoff triple, a walk, and a close play at the plate on a Brian Roberts sac fly that didn't go the Rockies' way to strike out B.J. Surhoff and pop out Melvin Mora to seal down the win. Cory Sullivan pitched in with a great diving stop of Roberts' fly ball and the throw that very nearly caught Eli Marrero at the plate. For once Jennings actually deserved to get a win (7 innings, 6 hits, five walks, seven strikeouts, including three of Scammin' Sammy Sosa). Witasick continued his unconscious work, striking out one in a perfect eighth.

Todd Helton had his first homer in what seems like two or three seasons, while Eddy Garabito and Jorge Piedra combined for six of Colorado's eight hits. Impressive, especially since I hadn't even noticed Piedra was on the big league roster. Daniel Cabrera pitched well for the O's in taking the tough loss as no one besides Mora had a multihit game for Baltimore.

The Rockies can't expect to win too many 2-1 games, at home or on the road; the offense is going to have pick itself up if we don't want to be left in the dust by the streaking Royals. For one night though, this is one to savor, and hopefully a game that will breed more winning ways on the road. That's another goofy baseball truism I kind of believe -- winning is contagious.

The Orioles are on the brink of oblivion. I have been saying this for two months, to anyone who will listen. "They're a mirage! There's three better teams in that division! This can't possibly last!" My conviction in this has only grown as the Orioles have tenaciously clung to first place. I'm beginning to take their success personally, actually. It's like they're just doing it to spite me.

There's a lot of reasons not to like the O's. There's their owner's selfish attitude towards the Nationals, for one thing, which may end up damaging the long-term health of a franchise all MLB needs to thrive. There's surly, out-of-shape "ace" Sir Sidney Ponson. There's Miguel Tejada, who's a great player and a wonderful guy but as a longtime A's supporter about whom I can't help but feel deeply bitter. Then there's Sammy Sosa, recently public enemy #1 in Chicago, now just another grotesquely overpaid faded star. If it wasn't for little-engine-that-could Brian Roberts and Melvin Mora's quints, this team would have no sympathetic angles at all.

The Orioles' offense must be considered for real. They lead the majors in OPS, slugging, batting average, and total bases. Roberts' home run pace (12 for his career before '05, 11 so far this year) has slowed but he's still leading the AL in average. Roberts is .361/.439/.613 this season compared to career numbers of .264/.328/.360. He's 27, which is a good age for peaks, but this is ridiculous. Far less surprising are MVP-like numbers of Tejada, who's .326/.373/.640 with 18 homers. He's not just the best shortstop in the American League, he might be the best player. Baltimore's third big threat is Mora, who'd be a lot of teams' best at .307/.364/.529. Find me a better second-third-short combo anywhere else in the majors and I'll buy you a shiny new donkey.

The Orioles have some mortal guys, too. Javy Lopez wasn't having a great year (7 homers, .316 OBP) and he's hurt besides. Sammy Sosa is a shell of his former self (.262/.335/.454, 8 homers). Rafael Palmeiro is fading a bit too (.257 BA, 8 homers). The complementary hitters in their lineup, guys like Jay Gibbons, B.J. Surhoff, Larry Bigbie, and David Newhan, all share OBPs around .310 or worse. The return of centerfielder Luis Matos, out since mid-May with a broken finger, should help in that area. Except for Roberts and Palmeiro, the Orioles don't walk very much. They're 20th in the majors in that category. Rockies pitchers would do well to avoid cluttering the bases with guys for Tejada, Roberts, and Mora to pound in.

The Orioles rank 7th overall in the AL in ERA, sixth in starting and eighth in relieving. They've been getting by with average pitching thanks to the dominance of their offense, clearly. It's not likely they'll be able to keep throwing as well as they have been. Their best starter, Erik Bedard, is out with a strained ligament in his left knee. Bruce Chen (3.31 ERA, 1.17 WHIP) is having as fluky a year as Roberts. Rodrigo Lopez and rookie sub Hayden Penn have been mediocre, Ponson and Daniel Cabrera have been somewhat less than that. Closer B.J. Ryan has been lights-out (1.93, 1.04, 17 saves), but the bullpen takes something of a dip in quality after that. John Parrish has quite a line: 17 1/3 innings pitched, 19 hits, 17 walks, 25 strikeouts, 7 of 15 inherited runners scored, a 2.08 WHIP, and a 3.12 ERA. Jorge Julio, named a possibility for the Rockies in trade, has been less wild and the O's second-best pen guy at 3.24, 1.05, 0-for-7 with inherited runners. Also, his middle name is "Dandys," no fooling. The rest of the pen names you need to know are recent acquisition and former starter James Baldwin, who's been wondrous, Todd Williams, who's been OK, and Steves Reed and Kline, who've been crummy.

It'll be Jason Jennings and Daniel Cabrera, a real clash of the titans, tonight, followed by BK and Sir Sidney on Saturday and youngsters Hayden Penn and Jeff Francis for the Sunday day game. The Orioles are really due for a right thrashing, why not us?

Jamey Wright pitched a pretty good game. Ryan Shealy hit his first career home run. That's all I've got to say about this one.

Well, I don't know about you, but last night's crushing defeat kind of soured me on dreams of fourth place. It's '62 Mets or bust now. That means it's time to take stock of who's leaving town and where they're going.

Before you do anything else, you should bookmark the other excellent Rockies blogs that are out there: Purple, RDR, Rox Head, DBO, Up In, Tap, and Diamond. (If I forgot anybody, I'm really sorry, e-mail me or comment and I will remedy the oversight.) It's quite remarkable that such a lousy baseball team has such a rabid Internet following; I think it speaks to both the untapped potential for wildly successful baseball in Denver and the unsolved mystery that is "winning at altitude." I'm going to go ahead and steal links like it's going out of style now, because there are a lot of rumors going around and I'd rather be thorough than original.

• Let's start with the newest one first:  Preston Wilson to the Cubs (reg. required). This could be an interesting one, as Corey Patterson, who in many ways resembles a younger, left-handed Wilson, could be available. Patterson's a speed guy who thinks he's a power hitter, but good coaching could convince him to swing for the fences at Coors and try and slap it on the ground on the road. He's also a talented, if erratic, center fielder. The Cubs also have scads of pitching prospects, all of whom are about eight feet tall if my recollections of their training camp in Mesa are correct.
• Wilson to D.C. or Baltimore. Both of these teams have overperforming offenses and have better records than their RS/RA would suggest (the Nationals, having been outscored, "should" be under .500). The Baltimore rumor has for a while been reliever Jorge Julio, who's a pure power guy with the requisite pure power guy problems (lotsa walks, lotsa homers). Julio will be going into his second year of arbitration but if he can be a dominant eighth inning guy, he'll be worth the money. Washington won't trade Ryan Church, which is surprisingly prudent for Jim Bowden. Zach Day, as I think I mentioned a while ago, is a pitching-to-contact guy who would be a disaster at altitude. He's hurt to boot. There is also a disagreement about how much of Preston's salary the Orioles will defray.
• Joe Kennedy to Oakland. With the emergence of Byung-Hyun Kim and the pending return of Aaron Cook, the Rockies actually have starting pitching to spare. Colorado would get Eric Byrnes, a hustling, heedless corner outfielder and blue chip reliever Jairo Garcia. Garcia has a 97 MPH fastball and a slider that John Sickels calls "overpowering," although above A-ball he's had some trouble throwing them for strikes. Still, Garcia-Julio-Tsao-Fuentes could make a fierce late-innings squadron in two years. I'm not sure what use the Rockies would have for Byrnes, as they're already a little long on left and right fielders who don't hit a lot of homers, but he might have to be included due to payroll considerations, which weigh heavily on both of these clubs. He's not under any sort of long-term deal so they could always just see what he can do for a couple of months then cut bait. I think some form of this deal will probably go through, although the Rockies might have to settle for a less tantalizing prospect than Garcia.
• Kennedy to the Dodgers. Another new one. This might be the competing pressure the Rockies need to get Garcia from the A's. Edwin Jackson, a big-time starting prospect who has regressed in the last two years, might be a possibility for Colorado, possibly moved to a relief role. His AAA numbers are pretty scary, though.
• Wilson to Texas, Kennedy or Jason Jennings to Philadelphia, Todd Helton to the Mets. These are just speculation at this point. Further updates as events warrant.

I'm sure I missed a few, please let me know if you've spotted any good rumors. We strive for excellence here at the Venison Lodge, formerly the Good, the Bad, and the Barmes.

Another road game, another "learning experience." The Rockies get out to a five-run lead and the bats go silent. The Indians crawl back into it off of a no-worse-than-usual Joe Kennedy. As soon as Brian Fuentes starts getting some positive attention, boom, here comes the game-tying, save-blowing ninth inning home run. Then Aaron Boone of all people touches Blaine Neal for the game-winner. This team is just hexed on the road, and by hexed I mean they have a bunch of players who aren't very good.

Garrett Atkins continues to be red hot (3 for 6, 2 runs batted in), and Ryan Shealy made his presence felt with a single, a double, and two RBIs of his own. Eddy Garabito was 2 for 4 hitting leadoff and Desi Relaford had two hits as well. It doesn't mean much now, but Jay Witasick was great for two high-pressure innings, striking out four. No fewer than six relief pitchers shut the Rockies' offense down after C.C. Sabathia failed to make it out of the fourth.

I "watched" most of this game on ESPN GameCast while hanging out at a Boulder coffee joint, so my pain was somewhat lessened. A text popup simply doesn't have the impact of a good radio call or the sight of an outfielder craning their neck at a long gone one. Who else is really ready for trade season to begin in earnest so we'll have some new things to write about besides bad starting pitching and ghastly road trips?

It's interesting that I chose this week to begin a discussion of stadiums around the league, because this has been a big week for new park news. There will apparently be not one but two new fields in New York City before decade's close, as the Mets have a deal in the works (registration required) for a new park in Queens and the Yankees will announce detailed plans for a new Yankee Stadium right next to the old one tomorrow. Meanwhile the long, strange trip towards a new ballpark in Oakland seems to be making some tentative progress. Interestingly, all three of these new ventures are to be privately funded, with city governments pitching in for help with transportation and area improvements. Bud Selig must be miserable now that there are no obvious cities left into which teams can be relocated.

And as long as we're on the subject, you can see how the new stadium in St. Louis is shaping up over here. The news is less good for the other team passing the hat around for a new playground, as the Marlins and Miami-Dade are still at an impasse when it comes to the $45 million remaining to be accounted for in the budget for a gleaming new Fish Tank adjacent to the Orange Bowl. I don't know where the Marlins think they are going to gain any leverage from; they can't stay at Dolphins Stadium and Vegas is a pipe dream. They should ask the Diamondbacks for some cash, since they seem to have that money press stashed in the bowels of the BOB. It couldn't be a worse investment than Russ Ortiz. Or, like I've suggested before, they could just ask Shaq.

One of the most boring games of the season so far. Jeff Francis didn't have it, the Rockies didn't seem particularly interested in bailing him out, and for Matt Anderson I have but three words: designated for assignment. Ryan Shealy was 0 for 3 with a walk in his major league debut. Atkins, Helton, Hawpe, and Closser had two hits apiece, but the rest of the Rockies' lineup had one total, and that's not going to get it done.

The Indians offense must have been happy to see Colorado, as everyone in the lineup got at least one knock. Travis Hafner hit about a five hundred-footer off of Anderson in garbage time. Even Aaron Boone got in on the fun. Jake Westbrook wasn't dominant but the Rockies couldn't string anything together against him past a pair of RBI singles from Garrett Atkins and Brad Hawpe in the 3rd.

During the innings I managed to keep awake for I found some more links for y'all: here's SI.com's John Rolfe on the Barmes quagmire, and for those of you high rollers with ESPN Insider, Rob Neyer on horrible road teams and Gary Gillette on future All-Stars, including Jeff Francis: "unless he gets hit by lightning, a true All-Star in the making."

If you'd told me before this season began that the Indians would rank second in the majors in bullpen ERA, I would have responded that that would give them a pretty good shot at a division title, or at least a long run at one. Add to that the fact that Cleveland is receiving excellent work from three starters (C.C. Sabathia, Cliff Lee, and Kevin Millwood), and I would have pretty much guaranteed postseason play for this team.

However, two things could not have been foreseen: the dominance (at least recordwise) of the Chicago White Sox and the mysterious disappearance of the Indians' offense. In 2004 Cleveland ranked fifth in the majors in OPS, fourth in OBP, and fifth in runs scored. This year those numbers are 26th, 29th, and 29th. There's no fathoming what brought about this change. The Tribe are fielding basically the same offense as they ran out last year, and injuries haven't been a big problem. There shouldn't be any reason for good hitters like Ben Broussard (.261/.312/.463), Victor Martinez (.207/.271/.338), and Casey Blake (.195/.278/.355) to be this awful, but awful they have been. The Indians' two big additions have been hurt (Juan Gonzalez) and worse than hurt (Aaron Boone, .181/.235/.314). If it wasn't for Travis Hafner, who started slow but has picked it up (.849 OPS, although only seven homers) and the surprising play of