I am deeply shamed.

The Kansas City Royals -- the official doormat franchise of Major League Baseball for well into their second decade -- have signed free-agent pitcher Gil Meche to a four-year deal worth $45 million. I have no rational explanation for this signing from either side's perspective. What do the Royals need with Meche? Why would Meche want to play there? It boggles the mind. It's April Fool's Day in December. This offseason has officially gone from a little out there to One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

But here's where the shame part comes in. The Rockies can't seem to get an extension done with Jason Jennings, the best pitcher the system has ever developed, a former Rookie of the Year, and the anchor of their pitching staff for several years running. At last report Jennings had turned down a deal for 3 years and $24 million.

The Royals can afford to pay Gil Meche more than ten million dollars a year, and the Rockies can't give Jason Jennings, who's actually good, more than eight? This is an unfunny joke. Dan O'Dowd, stop insulting Jennings and his agent's intelligence and give him 4 years, $50 million or five and sixty right this minute or else resign. You've always dreamed of being a major league general manager, but if your team is more broke than the Royals -- the ROYALS!!! -- then your dream is going unfulfilled. You might as well be the GM of the Newark Bears. What a sad state of affairs this is.

Update: Now the word is 5 years, $55 million. Well, okay, now the deal makes sense. It also looks like I pulled the trigger too soon on spreading the word about the Jon Garland/Willy T. White Sox-Astros deal. The Houston Chronicle: "Just hours after the Astros were extremely optimistic about landing Garland, it appeared as though the Astros' trade talks for Garland hit a serious snag and possibly even died."